Are you experiencing a mid-20’s crisis?
Wondering what you “should” be doing right now? Or, are you questioning your life’s purpose and values? Wondering if you’ll ever find a good partner and if you should have kids by now? Or ever?
Questioning your job and feeling stuck, working to live, living to work? Looking at going back to school and/or following your passion for yoga? Or something else? Then, do you find yourself circling back to the beginning? These are all common feelings for young adults going through what some people have called a mid-20’s crisis.
Just breathe, you’re doing great.
You’re not alone. So many young adults compare themselves to others at this time in life, asking themselves if they followed the right path or if they’re doing okay. Yes, you’re doing great! And, if you really feel like you’re not, just take a deep breath. Next, maybe try to do that once a day for a few minutes each day. Just revisiting a place of calm can help with focus and inspiration.
30’s really are the new 20’s.
It’s so confusing!!! 20-somethings in past generations were having kids and getting married. More than ever, this is shifting up for people in their 30’s. So, what are we supposed to be doing in our 20’s? Many of us are overworking at our jobs, trying to advance and make more money because we’re still living paycheck to paycheck. It’s grueling honestly. And, many of us have side gigs too.
Career.
Working nonstop is a feature of the millennial generation, but I can tell you that overdoing it is impressing no one and just hurting you! So many people try to overdo it to impress their boss (then the boss leaves the company and now who cares that you put in overtime off the clock for two years). So, do your best, but try not to overdo it.
As the saying goes, don’t become the expert at the copier or coffee maker. Just focus on you and the things you love in your job. When you shine at what you’re good at, the chances for promotion are higher than for the person who was the best at everything all around (the boss will likely want that person to remain doing everything – since they’re so great at it and all).
Kids and Family.
Not ready for kids yet, or asking yourself if you want them at all? This is also a common feature of the millennial generation. I mean, the world is crazy out there! Many people are quite scared to have children in this day in age and others think it would be unfair to them. Maybe you want them, but you don’t have a significant other. Disconnection is also a huge part of our generation and it can be hard to find a genuine partner.
Just hang in there and keep being yourself. Many people these days find a partner later in life and have kids later in life. It’s much more “normal” now, and studies show that women can have healthy pregnancies into their 40’s (hello Janet Jackson!), so if that’s something you wish for, science says you have time, so don’t stress too much.
Expectations and Time.
Another facet of the mid-20’s crisis is feeling like you should be “somewhere” by now. Like you should have contributed more to this world by now or found some sort of meaning. How about this… What if you used this time to try to find meaning in each day. Just one thing. Maybe even write it down and put it in a jar. Try to do it every day for a month. After that time, have you discovered new meaning? Read the notes you put in a jar. How does reading these make you feel? What is your perspective on reading these now?
You might see something new that you didn’t see before. And, it could make all the difference. As they say, the best is yet to come.
About the Author
Katie Bisbee-Peek, MA, LPC, NCC is a Denver-based counselor who uses humor and lightheartedness in her approach to therapy. Her clients are mainly teens and young adults going through life transitions and challenges unique to their age groups.
From working in schools and with youths as well as her own personal experiences, Katie is easy to relate to. She provides a safe and confidential place to air your worries, stresses, fears and cope with pain or work on problem solving. To email me in order to schedule a 15-minute consultation, just click here.